January 2012
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Brian: You're such a cuddlebear!
Kat: Roawr!
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Brian didn't get the job.
He applied to work with me in Greenpeace. But now I don’t know what to do with three weeks left on my visa. I just wish there was a way to spend it with him. Things are so completely different now. So easy and comfortable and happy. Everything makes sense and now that’s all being taken away from me.
“Specifically to the requirement that a woman would need to see ultrasound images...”
– Dr. Nancy Stanwood, OB/GYN, knocking it out of the goddamn park at The Hairpin. (via floodedwithcarbonlight)
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Relationships are complicated shit.
So we kinda live together now. Brian made a fort for us to live in in the back of his car out of a sheet and his Ireland flag. He’s cute. And before today/yesterday, it was amazing. But yesterday he applied to work for Greenpeace and then came with me to work. He actually backed out on the farming job he had offered to him before to work with me. I know he loves me now. And...
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I love how he always has to protect his big blue...
And how the “I’m cool because I’m wearing sunglasses” face he makes every time he does so.
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I love his big pouty lips
They make him insecure because he thinks they’re girly.
…I also love his insecurities.
They somehow make his beauty more genuine.
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I love the way he bites the air and eats the...
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I'm so happy I sprained my foot on acid and...
Brian and I have spent the past week living in his car, cuddling, avoiding the workmates I don’t want to live with, fucking, eating chocolate, watching movies, making forts in his car, talking for hours and being reclusive.
Yesterday we ran away from the other Greenpeace people to the next city and spent the day alone, away from everyone else, and we watched Up in our car-fort and went...
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Kat Kinzer is totally in a relationship with Brian...
Whether or not he’s too shy to admit it to Facebook.
Real women have/are/do/don't-
whatfreshhellisthis:
Do us all a favour and shut the fuck up before you even try to finish that godawful sentence.
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He told me he loved me last night.
Sober. And I can feel that it’s true.
…I need to love him back again.
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ORGASMS ON ACID ARE FUCKING INCREDIBLE.
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So yeah,
Brian and I dropped acid together the other day in a park with boiling mud pools and crazy sulphur clouds everywhere. It was pretty fucking incredible. Even though we were followed by some creepy guy in a red shirt (this legitimately happened, cunts; totally not a hallucinatory delusion) for half an hour. And even though he was nearly raped when he belt broke in a public bathroom. But it was...
Kat: I cut my hair again. I shouldn't have, I think I cut it too short. I was--
Brian: It's pretty.
Kat: ...
Kat: :D
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I need to know that it's possible to fall in love...
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I wonder if I could love him again if he fell in...
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GODDAMNIT, I WANT TO LOVE HIM AGAIN.
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I ran out of money much quicker than I expected. ...
Brian: When are you gonna leave? Not that I want you to go... I don't want you to go. But you should get going if you want to hitch-hike.
Kat: Ughh I know, I'm just really nervous. I considered buying a bus ticket. They're pretty cheap, but I should just hitch-hike.
Brian: Do you need to borrow some money? You do, I'm gonna give you some money.
Kat: No you won't. I'll get paid soon. You don't have a job, silly.
Brian: Yeah but I've got money. Take mah moneh, woman.
Kat: No.
Brian: I don't want some strange guy picking you up. I'm buying you a bus ticket.
Kat: Hehehe... Okay.
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We are right for each other. We fit so well...
But he just can’t do what he needs to do for me right now. That’s just how it’s going to have to be.
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I don't understand anything.
I feel like he’s probably no good for me now, and it’s really obvious what has to be done… But now that I’m not around him anymore, there’s just a huge hole.
I don’t need him, I don’t love him… But I still miss him.
It definitely doesn’t help that he’s always so incredibly fucking sweet to me the day I leave. The way he looks at me...
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I think I still love him...
But differently. With…less spark.
Places I Would Like To Kiss You
better-dash-things:
On the sidewalk
In a car
In an airport
In a hotel lobby
At a museum
At a restaurant
At a party
On a beach
In a park
With your friends
All alone
In a stairwell
In a doorway
In your bed
In any bed
Anywhere
December 2011
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Yeah, so, apparently...
He didn’t know we were going to go travelling together after Christmas. Even though I already asked him over text. And in person. And kept referring to it when we were together. And he never objected to it before. But apparently, it was still news to him when we were packing to leave the hostel in Wellington. I was so angry. I couldn’t catch a bus, because it was Boxing Day and...
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I'm upset.
I want to spend New Year’s with Brian and kiss him at midnight.
I want to travel together for a few more days until I have to start work again and not be able to travel with him anymore.
He wants to stop travelling tomorrow and find a job instead.
And he’s not the same since he’s been thinking about that constantly.
…
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But fuck, man... His eyes.
His fucking gorgeous eyes…
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He always treats me so much nicer before we have...
It’s not intentional, and he doesn’t even realize he does it…
…So many of the things he does and says make him seem like such a dick.
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Brian: :)
Kat: What?
Brian: What?
Kat: Why are you so smiley?
Brian: There's a naked girl on top of me, of course I'm smiling! Shit!
Kat: *giggle*
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You can only be asked so many times not to love...
Christmas alone in a deserted city...
Fuck.
